43 Comments

So many good bits of wisdom here! “You are not for everyone” is one I will take with me, along with “no one is going to thank you for…”. So so good. Thank you!

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I'm so glad you enjoyed it, Bridget. I know, "You are not for everyone" is such a sigh of relief!!

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What a balm to read about someone who celebrates their long-term relationship. Another excellent conversation, Jane (& Sam). Thank you for sharing it 🙏

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So glad you enjoyed it, Clare! ❤️

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Jane,I just want to wish you a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year...glad I found you on Substack,your writings make my days and nights better.Thank you for being you; I hope things get better for you in the new year...😻🎄🌟

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Apologies for just seeing this, Sandra!! Thank you for your kind words. I'm awfully glad you're here. And best wishes to you, as well. ❤️

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Thanks for this! I am always interested in what Sam has to say - she is a great advocate for women (especially those who have passed 40) and has brilliant recommendations.

I was not familiar with Deborah Levy until now - just ordered two of her books! The mention of 'Flowers in the Attic' took me right back. We had a queue for that at boarding school and the one and only copy got passed from girl to girl until the cover was in tatters and the pages were falling out!

And finally - not only does he look adorable, I think Sausage is one of the cutest names I've ever heard for a cat. My friend had a very sweet cat called Cookie - maybe it's the food associations?!

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I agree! Sam is all round incredible!!

I knoooooow, I loved that book. I remember doing a book report on it in like sixth grade or something!!

Sausage is the cutest!! I walk my neighbor's dog Cookie every morning. Food names are pretty great!

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Thank you Jane for the introduction to Sam, a delightful read early this morning. I felt akin to Sam in many ways, especially her love of jeans. I can't think of any attire that I feel more at home in than jeans. I recently found a photo of me when I was probably 4, sitting on a ledge at an Easter egg hunt with other children my age. The other girls were all dressed in their Easter best, frilly dresses and cute patent leather shoes. I'm sitting there in jeans, I think back in the day they were called petal pushers. I look happy as can be, regardless of what everyone else was wearing. I still feel that way. Looking forward to checking out the reading suggestions. 💕

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Oh, I love that image of you, Sue!! And, yes, jeans are the best! I've always thought that style was called pedal pushers because they were meant to make riding a bike easier. But I like petal pushers much more!! Glad you enjoyed the interview! ❤️

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I could have the spelling wrong, but I like the idea of the flowers as well. I marveled at the photo because it just goes to show our personalities are alive and well at such a young age. Thanks again, and I hope you enjoy the holidays.

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Oh,Jane...thank you sooo much for the interview with Sam,I just loved it!Her insights and giving a voice to older women(I'm 62)resonated with me. I especially love the photo and sweet little story of Sam and Sausage...😻Thank you always,Jane,for sharing!

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So glad you enjoyed it, Sandra! And Sausage is so lovely!! I know you love cats! 🌸

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Screaming into a pillow! Or a bath towel in my case. So much good stuff in this post. Thank you.

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I knoooooow, I love that!! Glad you enjoyed the interview, CeCe!

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Always appreciate Sam’s writing, podcasts and insights, thanks for this, Sam and Jane.

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Sam is sooooo good! Glad you enjoyed the interview, Wendy!

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Love Sam. Solidly delivering meaningful stuff day after day with no look 👀 at me fanfare. Praise be!

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Yes!!

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I really enjoyed this piece and now I have so many more books to read!

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I'm so glad, Flory!!! And, yes, so many more books!

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A few notes

1. added wintering to my reading list (i think it's the second time i've seen it recommended so that gets an automatic add!)

2. sam your marriage is inspirational

3. I too hope to retain my eyesight, such a good hope

4. and to buck the trend in question 11, thank you for all your hard work!

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Yes to all of this! And Wintering is so good!!

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Jane and Sam thank you for this excellent interview. I love all the pictures and covet the snuggly long fleece coat you're wearing! This is a reminder for me to get my hands on Wintering and that, every once in a while it's okay to reach out to people we greatly admire because they just might show you that they are people too, as happened with you and Kate!

I recently wrote about how what we wear can change the way we feel if we make sure our outsides match our insides so I enjoyed reading about your love for jeans (ha, sorry about that horrendous sentence!)

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Wintering is so good!! And, yes, clothing can be so transformative. I am watching the latest season of Queer Eye and seeing how people light up and feel so differently about themselves in new clothing has really touched my heart!♥️

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"You are not for everyone" is a good motto! I'll remind myself of this wisdom. Thank you Sam and Jane!

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Such a good motto! I’m glad you enjoyed the interview, Imola! 🌸

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lovely interview. i also reread "Wintering" this time of year (along with "Winter Solstice" by Nina Maclaughlin). and yes to clothes that comfort me, not someone else idea of me. work that is call (thank you Sharon Blackie for that.) and the always needed reminder "that i am not for everyone." and Sausage sounds like the BEST cat!

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Wintering is also one of my favorite books! Sometimes I just dive in and read sections of it for a reboot! And, yes, I love Sausage from afar!! Glad you enjoyed the interview, Anne!

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Loved this... and I'm thrilled to hear "I'm not for everyone" - it sort of gives me permission to shake off the urge to censor my writing because I'm afraid of what family and friends may think.

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Oh gosh, that is a tough censor!! I have that, too! And, yes, "I'm not for everyone" certainly helps!

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Loved this interview. I am reminded once again that we are not for everyone. It always feels like that’s such a life giving force. It creates spaciousness for those who might desire to become bilingual in our heart 💜 language. When not taken personally, it is such a freedom. Sam feels so comfy and cozy. I’ll bet she owns the fuzziest pair of slippers, and if not, a must for her! Thank you Jane and Sam. ✨

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"It creates spaciousness for those who might desire to become bilingual in our heart 💜 language." So lovely! Yes! And yes to fuzzy slippers for Sam!

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