Such wonderful vulnerability, Jane. I'm 86% Irish, I understand ancestral trauma, it never goes away. As you, I experienced cranial sacral therapy and found the part of my body that held the trauma, my throat, accounting for the years I never spoke up or had an opinion. Thank you for your beautiful words.
This beautiful essay has given me a lot to think about. I often feel that loneliness, even when the external circumstances don’t seem to warrant it, and it’s a comfort to think about it being a seed from long ago it makes sense.
Oh, thank you, Angie! That means so much. Yes, the actual seed not belonging to us definitely provides a new lens. One I'm finding helpful. I hope it helps you, too!
It helps me a lot and affirms something that I experienced recently, having to hold my loneliness at arm's length to see that it was not consistent with my lived reality, that there were friends and loved ones near and far and a kind of spirit that abided with me, even when I felt the most alone, that I was not really alone but almost carried through the worst of times, though I could only really see so in retrospect.
I really love this complex braided essay, with your current life and pets, your father over the years, the war years in the old country, the concept of inherited loneliness, and surviving a serious head injury all included. I envy you having a loving father, just as your mother had a loving father. Surely that's also in the genes? My favorite part was how lying on the ground even in winter helped stabilize you. When I'm walking in the forest with my dog every day on familiar paths, I want to lie down but almost never give myself permission. You've inspired me to grant myself that healing too. Thank you.
Thank you, Kirie! Your kind words mean so much! And, yes, I do believe love and kindness and joy can be inherited. I hope to write on that one day!! I know that feeling so well of wanting to lie down in the woods! If your dog will let you, I encourage you to do it!! It helps me like nothing else. And it would be so extra potent in the forest! ❤️
Jane, you put so beautifully into words many feelings that I recognize. And I always really love the way you tell you’re mum and dads journey with such understanding. Love you xx
Thank you for your kind words, Virginia. And, yes, you're absolutely right. This new perspective has changed my relationship with myself and many in my life.
You are a gift ~ gifted with words that settle in me as you, paint your Mother your Father your garden your pets Delilah and Rudy all a part of me now. Only gratitude you share your marrow without picking at the bones , instead observing holding them close and loving them.
Oooooh, Rochelle! Thank you for your beautiful words. They mean so much! And thank you for becoming a founding subscriber! Your ongoing faith in me means the world!
If I had known how long this is, I wouldn’t have started my day with your original and powerful piece, which clearly rises from years of reflection and research. I particularly liked your evocation of your parents’ formative wartime years. I don’t read many essays that invite me to consider my own and my family’s experience differently, as yours has done this morning. I have thought and written plenty about these things, yet there is more to discover, more to say.
Thank you for your vulnerability. I wonder, how did you think about loneliness when you lived in NYC, surrounded by so many people? As the grandchild of Holocaust survivors, I think often about the inheritance of trauma: the biology of it and the narrative of it. There is something social in trauma, but it is mostly isolating. Anyway, thank you for your beautiful writing. I put lots of mental check marks all over it! ❤️
Aw, thanks, Jillian. And thank you for reading it. I never felt consciously lonely in NYC. My life was such a bustle combined with good, healthy downtime. But now I wonder if I was just busying over it! Oh my goodness, I didn't know that about your grandparents. Yes, I'm certain you've inherited some of that trauma. There's lots of talk these days about clearing the trauma of past generations. Which is a lovely thought. But it can be hard enough to clear your own!
What a beautiful essay. Thanks so much for sharing it, Jane. I wish it would have been a whole book as I couldn't stop reading. It made me feel seen. I even printed it out and put it in my diary to read again. ❤️
It is sunny here today, but I sat there on a kindly old stump, in fading light, in snowy woods listening to the storyteller as this tale tumbled out. Thank you.
Stunning as always Jane ❤️
Thanks, Mary! And thank you for helping me along the way!
Such wonderful vulnerability, Jane. I'm 86% Irish, I understand ancestral trauma, it never goes away. As you, I experienced cranial sacral therapy and found the part of my body that held the trauma, my throat, accounting for the years I never spoke up or had an opinion. Thank you for your beautiful words.
Oh, Trish, thank you for your beautiful words! They mean so much. And, yes, the throat chakra! Same!
OMG- your writing takes my breath away, Jane. What an exquisite (and educational!) piece.
Thank you Oritte! I was concerned no one was going to read it because it's long. So it's lovely to start the day with your uplifting comment!
This beautiful essay has given me a lot to think about. I often feel that loneliness, even when the external circumstances don’t seem to warrant it, and it’s a comfort to think about it being a seed from long ago it makes sense.
Oh, thank you, Angie! That means so much. Yes, the actual seed not belonging to us definitely provides a new lens. One I'm finding helpful. I hope it helps you, too!
It helps me a lot and affirms something that I experienced recently, having to hold my loneliness at arm's length to see that it was not consistent with my lived reality, that there were friends and loved ones near and far and a kind of spirit that abided with me, even when I felt the most alone, that I was not really alone but almost carried through the worst of times, though I could only really see so in retrospect.
So true, Holly!
I jus LOVED this piece, Jane. The writing was elegant and the ideas refreshing. Loved it. Thank you for publishing it.
Thank you so much, Alle! I was a little nervous to share it.
I really love this complex braided essay, with your current life and pets, your father over the years, the war years in the old country, the concept of inherited loneliness, and surviving a serious head injury all included. I envy you having a loving father, just as your mother had a loving father. Surely that's also in the genes? My favorite part was how lying on the ground even in winter helped stabilize you. When I'm walking in the forest with my dog every day on familiar paths, I want to lie down but almost never give myself permission. You've inspired me to grant myself that healing too. Thank you.
Thank you, Kirie! Your kind words mean so much! And, yes, I do believe love and kindness and joy can be inherited. I hope to write on that one day!! I know that feeling so well of wanting to lie down in the woods! If your dog will let you, I encourage you to do it!! It helps me like nothing else. And it would be so extra potent in the forest! ❤️
Jane, you put so beautifully into words many feelings that I recognize. And I always really love the way you tell you’re mum and dads journey with such understanding. Love you xx
Thank you, Lorna! ❤️
Beautiful. So affirming of what we so easily (and wrongly) presume to be a negative.
Thank you for your kind words, Virginia. And, yes, you're absolutely right. This new perspective has changed my relationship with myself and many in my life.
You are a gift ~ gifted with words that settle in me as you, paint your Mother your Father your garden your pets Delilah and Rudy all a part of me now. Only gratitude you share your marrow without picking at the bones , instead observing holding them close and loving them.
Oooooh, Rochelle! Thank you for your beautiful words. They mean so much! And thank you for becoming a founding subscriber! Your ongoing faith in me means the world!
If I had known how long this is, I wouldn’t have started my day with your original and powerful piece, which clearly rises from years of reflection and research. I particularly liked your evocation of your parents’ formative wartime years. I don’t read many essays that invite me to consider my own and my family’s experience differently, as yours has done this morning. I have thought and written plenty about these things, yet there is more to discover, more to say.
Thank you for reading it, Rona, and for your kind words! It is long! And, yes, there is always more to discover with our families.
Thank you for your vulnerability. I wonder, how did you think about loneliness when you lived in NYC, surrounded by so many people? As the grandchild of Holocaust survivors, I think often about the inheritance of trauma: the biology of it and the narrative of it. There is something social in trauma, but it is mostly isolating. Anyway, thank you for your beautiful writing. I put lots of mental check marks all over it! ❤️
Aw, thanks, Jillian. And thank you for reading it. I never felt consciously lonely in NYC. My life was such a bustle combined with good, healthy downtime. But now I wonder if I was just busying over it! Oh my goodness, I didn't know that about your grandparents. Yes, I'm certain you've inherited some of that trauma. There's lots of talk these days about clearing the trauma of past generations. Which is a lovely thought. But it can be hard enough to clear your own!
What a beautiful essay. Thanks so much for sharing it, Jane. I wish it would have been a whole book as I couldn't stop reading. It made me feel seen. I even printed it out and put it in my diary to read again. ❤️
Oh, Christine, thank you! That means so much to me!! ❤️
This is a balm for me.. I love your writing.
Thank you so much! That means the world to me!
It is sunny here today, but I sat there on a kindly old stump, in fading light, in snowy woods listening to the storyteller as this tale tumbled out. Thank you.
I loved learning so much about you, and about loneliness. Thank you Jane!
Aw, thanks, Anne!
So lovely, Jane!
Thank you, Sari!