47 Comments

Your essay has left me breathless this morning. You put into words some of the relationship between my mother and me that I have never felt able to adequately describe/capture in words. I will come back to this many times I think as I absorb the pieces that fit and give me comfort or comfort-after-pain as the memories flood in….a mother who needed to be mothered and who insisted we be best friends. Oh the pressure. Thank you, Jane ❤️

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Yes, so much pressure! It's amazing the relationship I have with my mom now that the pressure has lifted. I understand her so much better! Thank you for your kind words, Sandy. They mean a lot!

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Jane! Mothers and daughters: so relate. Love the history of your relationship too and the generosity and tenderness as well as the tension and desire to be everything to a parent. I’ve woven that story in my dna too and am still unraveling the threads in some ways.

The ring is simple and elegant like a bird song. I’m super grateful for your voice and storytelling. Your generosity and courageous empathy are so vivid.

This is the month of my Mom’s passing. So 10,000 thank you’s for your beautiful and real tribute!

Even as I write this I remember the Wild of being human and the longing to love and be loved as we are by our flock.

Here’s to the many adventures on this big blue marble and beyond! So much love to you. Xoxo

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Oh, thank you for your beautiful words. I really appreciate them. It sounds like we've had similar paths with our moms. "The desire to be everything to a parent" So true! And so painful!

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So welcome, Jane! Yes, similar paths and so much magic. And yes, there was heartache and struggle. The now though is liberation and big love. She was a warrior and a teacher and a human here like us all. Thank you again for your heart and storytelling.

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Such perfect timing for this piece to appear. Your ring is beautifully crafted and the tribute to your mother makes my heart ache. I know this grief well. Thank you for sharing this with us, especially right now.

The month of August is especially tough for me as it holds two dates for me- the last time I was able to see and hug my mom and then the day she died two weeks later. We’d finally made up and then in a blink she was gone.

One of the items I still have of hers is piece of jade with an elephant affixed to it on a gold chain. She wasn’t one for fancy things, but she loved this necklace for her special occasions.

I’m swimming in memories now. I’m grateful for that ❤️ Thank you, Jane!

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Oh, gosh, that sounds like a lot, Mesa. I'm so glad you made the peace in the end! And thank you, as always, for your kind words. ❤️

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I love this tribute to your mother, Jane. It is beautifully written. I love the signficance of the ring. Thank you for sharing this.

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I'm so glad, Jen! Thanks for your kind words!

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I'll never forget when we broke open my mother's jewelry box. It was so connected with her body, her physicality, for me that I felt like I could see her hands again. I felt a deep, gut physical yearning for her. Thank you for this lovely, lovely piece.

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Ooooh, beautiful, Kate! Thanks for sharing. And thank you for your kind words. xx

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Oh, Jane.

This is beautiful.

Thank you for sharing.

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Thank you so much, Lisa! 🌸

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This is a gorgeous story and reminds me so much of my relationship with my mom. I think of her when I see the birds and ask her to come write my novel with me - a fantastical tale of a mother and daughter who’ve become separated. I’m learning how many of us carry our mothers with us, especially when the relationships were complicated. Thank you for sharing this along with your beautiful ring 💜

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Angela, that's so beautiful! And I bet your novel is gorgeous because of it! Yes, so many of us do. And so often, as with me, the relationship has deepened and strengthened after death! Thank you for your kind words! ❤️

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Jane, so lovely. Isn't it amazing that we come to see that it is us who changes in the end? We don't really need others to change. And then they do! When we don't need them to. So tender. Thank you.

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So true!! Thank you for your kind words, Alecia!

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Oh I love this Jane. It makes me pine for my own mother, whose jewelry often graces my fingers and ears. Your ring is exquisite.

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Thank you, Karen! And how wonderful you have your mom's jewelry. It does allow us to keep the connection alive and even thriving! xx

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oh, tear leakage as i read this. so tender. our parents' stories overlap quite a bit, so the London stories (both eras) resonates deeply. thank you for this. thank you thank you thank you.

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Ooooh, Anne, thank you for your kind words! I'm glad it resonated! xx

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Jane, even more than your excellent and inspiring interviews, I always look forward to your personal essays! Thank you for sharing your mother with us, and helping us feel less alone in our longing to be mothered/ mothers. And congratulations for the novel!

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Oh gosh, Imola, that means so much. Thank you!! ❤️

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What a beautiful piece of writing. You’ve woven together a tribute and a deep query about purpose and relationships. And I love the ring.

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Thank you so much, Angela! I'm glad you enjoyed it!

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My heart cockles are warmed and the therapist in me witnesses the complexity of your relationship...❤️‍🩹

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Oooooh, thank you, Toby! That means a lot! ❤️

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Your mother sounds like a truly wonderful person. Thank you for sharing.

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Thank you! She was! 🌸

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This is so beautiful Jane. Xxx

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Thank you, Rebecca! xx

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Absolutely gorgeous words and your ring!! Does it sit on your pinky finger? I spied it in your video with Letters From Love and thought to myself- now THAT is how to rock a signet!! 😍

Thank you for sharing your relationship with Mum so tenderly with us. It felt like a coming home to bask in.

Xx

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Yes, that's it!! I never take it off! The jeweler is Rebus. The prices have gone up considerably in recent years. But the quality is fantastic!

And thank you, thank you for your kind words. They mean a lot! xx

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