Holiday Gratitude ⭐️
Some dollops of love and hope for the holidays! Plus: The Gratitude Club!
Hi Beyonders!
Holidays can be wonderful! And they can be stressful! Oof. So I thought it might be lovely to offer up some gratitude gleaned from some of our favorite heart-centered minds!
Enjoy!
xJane
A Beautiful Time
“I'm in a moment of a lot of gratitude. I've definitely not had an easy life. There's been plenty of pain. Whenever I have the sense that somebody is envious or competitive with me, I feel like saying to them, “Do you want all of it? You don't get to cherry pick.” My life could have been otherwise. It's pretty hard won. But it is a beautiful time now.”
— Dani Shapiro [read Dani’s full interview]
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Weird Kid With A Dream
[On going through old photos for publicity after Let Us Descend was picked for Oprah’s Book Club]: That whole process made me so grateful to my family, but also grateful to the foolish, headstrong, weird kid that I was who looked at Toni Morrison and Alice Walker and Gloria Naylor and all these Black women writers who I revere and thought, Maybe I could do that that thing too, when it was so far out of the realm of possibility for me based on where I'm from and the kind of folks that I came from.”
— Jesmyn Ward [read Jesmyn’s full interview]
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Children Set Us Free
“For me, being around my kids I knew immediately what I loved. Watching them become who they are freed me up in this interesting way to like what I like. A lot of people when they become parents, find it very constrictive. For me, it absolutely set me free.”
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[read Austin’s full interview]***
Falling In Love With Our Bodies
“At twenty seven, during my pregnancy with my oldest daughter, I fell in love with my body. I marveled at the changes, at the fact that I was growing a little person inside me. And I knew that she (and later, my younger daughter) needed me to keep loving my body so that they could have a shot at loving theirs. Perimenopause and now menopause come with other changes. I’m aware of how aging changes my body, and I try to approach this with curiosity and gratitude (I’m happy to be healthy), rather than judgment.”
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[read Deesha’s full interview]***
Changing People’s Lives
“I’ve done nothing really but write from my own very ordinary self. To have people read my writing and say: I feel changed by it, I feel inspired by it, I feel impacted by it. That was always my dream. It feels like a beautiful gift I’ve been given in exchange for the work I’ve done. I’m grateful for the exciting business-related things that have happened with my books, but the most exciting thing far and away has always been when somebody says to me, you wrote this and it changed me. And thank you.”
—
[read Cheryl’s full interview]Whilst we’re on the topic of gratitude, I want to share something I’m grateful for this week. On Sunday, I launched a GoFundMe to help cover my upcoming trip to Baltimore for treatment for head and brain injury. Many of you donated alongside fellow Substackers — and I am so deeply grateful for your support.
Starting a fundraiser was not an easy decision for me. But since the accident three decades ago, I have spent upwards of $600,000 on my health trying to return to a normal life. This is a staggering amount for anyone, especially a writer and teacher.
Through my own hard work (even at my sickest, out of necessity, I continued to teach and write), the help of loved ones, and a careful budget, I have managed to keep myself above water all these many many years. But the timing of this trip, a week before Christmas and hot on the heels of two emergency vet visits (both babies are now fine!), was not good. Like so many with chronic health challenges, my savings were wiped out ages ago, so it became clear I wasn’t going to be able to cover the expenses of the trip.
This was an extraordinarily humbling moment for me. I felt ashamed and embarrassed, also anger at the American healthcare system (until Obamacare, I couldn’t even get insurance due to a pre-existing condition), but as the day wore on and so many people included beautiful notes with their generous donations, I was bowled over with love and gratitude. So much so, I barely slept that night, my nervous system was abuzz with joy as well as the inability to take it all in!
I’ve not publicly shared about my financial struggles before. (My parents both grew up poor in London during WWII and it was drilled into me that you do not discuss hardship. This belief is compounded by the heartbreaking fact there is a lot of shame to being chronically unwell. Something I hope to try my hand at writing about soon!). But so many of you have kindly let me know how much you enjoy my personal essays (Thank you, friends! That means so much!!) and asked to know more about my health. And the financial burden of chronic health challenges is definitely a piece of that.
It has always been my desire for Beyond to provide a sustainable income for me, to cover my basic living expenses which would make medical expenses easier to handle. This has not yet happened. As I navigate ways to care for myself going into the new year, I’m so appreciative of this community, all the joy and wisdom and laughter and friendship alongside the love of and concern for the planet and her animals that abounds here. And, of course, the love of writing! Thank you all for being here. We’ve become a family grounded in joy and truth and gratitude and beautiful words.
I’m deeply grateful to those who are able to be paid subscribers. Beyond absolutely could not happen without you. And I’m so touched by everyone who donated to my first (and hopefully last!!) fundraiser. I still haven’t fully recovered from that tidal wave of love! Perhaps I’m not meant to. Perhaps I’m meant to always carry a jar of that love water in my pocket!
🎈Last week I shared the first of my ideas for Beyond going forward: The Prompt Club. You all seemed to really like that one. Yay! So it’s in the works! Updates soon!
Here’s my second idea:
The Gratitude Club: So much is hard right now. For me, in addition to acknowledging the truth of our struggles, it really helps to befriend the good. And there is a lot of it! A few days ago, I posted something I was grateful for in Notes and the response was lovely. I thought we might try something similar here. Research has shown that gratitude improves health, sleep, relationships, and generally makes us kinder and more optimistic humans. Who couldn’t do with all of that?!
So once a week, as either a Chat or a Thread, I thought we could share something that brought us joy, made us laugh, encouraged us, supported us, something we accomplished, something we don’t take for granted (running water, shelter, food), someone we adore, a book that soothed us, an adorable squirrel that enchanted us, something that simply helped us get through. We are a powerful community. We can help one another by sharing and by witnessing.
In the comments, will you let me know if you’d be interested in The Gratitude Club. And if so, would you prefer Chat or Thread? These are both new to me, so I’m on a learning curve. Thank you!
Beyond will be on holiday the weeks of December 22nd and 29th. I’ll be back in the new year with some exciting new interviews, questionnaires, essays, and details on The Prompt Club! I’m excited. Happy Holidays, Dear Beyonders!
⭐️⭐️ Beyond is a reader-supported publication with the goal of bringing as much light as possible into this world of ours. If you value this work and would like to support it, consider becoming a paid subscriber. Thank you! ⭐️⭐️
Thank you for being here! ❤️ You know how much I love your comments. I read them all.
What are you grateful for these days?
And please let me know in your interested in The Gratitude Club!
This was so lovely to read. Thank you. I have been going through my subscriptions and unfollowing a lot of accounts that don’t spark joy. Yours definitely does. Love the gratitude idea. Not sure of difference between chat and thread Substack is a bit of a mystery to me! Have a wonderful holiday break. See you on the other side. ❤️🏴
Inspired to propound on Jólabókaflóð, Icelands flood of books with a writing pal in our pre-Christmas FaceTime conversation, we started to grin then laugh at the joy of it. It set me to planning for a Christmas Day spent eating just what I wanted (without cooking it) and lazing around reading my Christmas books and anything else I felt like (but no Social media, even Substack, this is a old-time reading kind of day, in front of a fire and with candles in the windowsill. I'll have some real food in the fridge and good bread and homemade mayonnaise so it won't be only cookies and cake....Just writing this here makes my heart lift in gratitude for the leisure and place to enjoy such a day.