This is an area so many of us need to look at. My nature is to go rather than stop. Then I watch my two pups who seem to have play/rest figured out so well. First thing they do is pay attention to their bodies. When they finish running they lie down. If I take them outside they roll in the grass then sit there viewing the world. Why can’t I learn this??
Exactly!!! Same with kitty cats!! This week during my daily half hour of rest, I've been plopping on the grass beside them and watching what they watch (birds, squirrels, trees). So far, it's been great!
I take regular time off, but I often struggle with what to do to fill up the time. I have found (work in progress) that it takes some practice and lowering my own expectations. When you have been "fed" for years on the adrenaline rush of productivity, it can be a shock to the system to go without. Last night I accepted an invite to watch a movie with a neighbor. Not someone I've particularly close to, and not my favorite movie, but I very much enjoyed being in the community of others.
Giving myself permission to try all the things. The fails are part of the goal.
Sharon! Yes!!! I've been doing well with the half hour daily breaks thus far. But I was both excited for, and confused and nervous about a Full Day Off. Yikes. I had a rough idea of how it might unfold, and wasn't even sure if I "should" have a rough idea or if I "should" just let it happen (clearly, it's been waaaay too long w/o a day off). And then, that morning my cousin invited me to her cottage on the lake and it turned out to be a perfect day! Yay. Now next Sunday awaits...
I work full time during the week, so I try to ensure both weekend days are filled with simple pursuits that are restful, enjoyable and I do them as slowly as possible (including a visit to the gym and working out slowly). One of the best things I have ever done is employ someone else to clean my house twice a month, and I really enjoy the fact that I don't have to do this on the weekends. There are of course other chores, but I try to avoid doing those as much as possible and focus on the restful activities.
That is so smart, Louise! And I like the emphasis on moving slowly. One of the things I've always enjoyed about being freelance and now having this newsletter, is I can work whenever I want. That's been terrific for me. But lately I think it's backfiring, so I'm moving toward trying out the structure you've so beautifully laid out here! Thank you!
Yay for time off! So necessary, and yet I can’t seem to take off a full day... I mean I could, I guess. But it often feels impossible! 30 minutes a day, I can do!
Oooooh, Jillian, I'm not convinced I can do it either. I'm concerned I'll be packing out the rest of my week into insanity! For instance, I'm cramming in so much today in preparation for tomorrow, that I haven't taken my half hour rest! Whee! But maybe it will all be okay?! Do you want to experiment together tomorrow?? Let's try it! I'm committed to trying two Sundays. And two weeks of half an hour of rest a day. And then seeing what's what!
Oh my gosh, Jane! I am so grateful for you, too. I love working together. And I love how you are taking care of yourself through this time of burnout. I wish we lived closer so we could watch the birds together (this is part of my daily routine, too). Sending you love.
I too take absolute delight daily in watching the birds in my two birdbaths, both crafted from recycled beach glass and rebar, with more beach glass and stones inside for the birds to perch on. I also recently learned that our very necessary wasps, hornets, and bees need water, and they are along the edges sipping. Our birdbaths are surrounded by a scoop of shrubs and perches, above a little native plant garden, so the creatures have privacy and safety, but we can see them from our deck. Every time I walk past that little bird haven on my way to the big canvas tent where we sleep in the summer, my heart soars. We recently had one of those heat waves, and I hooked up the hummingbird sprayer so a soft mist filled the area. Flocks of tiny birds danced around the entire birdbath nook vocalizing to the others to join in.
Ooooooh, Kirie, how beautiful!! My version of that calms my nervous system and soothes my soul like nothing else. Sounds like you have a similar experience. And, yes, I have a hive in my back garden and I love how the bees drink from the edges. I also have stones in the middle--mine are for the bees...but they rarely use them. But the bees do! It's so joyful to watch them drink and splash around. And I have birds who take dirt baths, also quite wondrous! Plus all the squirrels and chipmunks and bunnies, et cetera.
One thing I do not have is a tent. I love that you sleep out there in the summer. Do you find you sleep more deeply?
Also: What's a hummingbird sprayer? I might need one of those!
You've inspired me to find myself a bird mister! This sounds lovely. And its been so hot where we are, I have been not wanting to venture outside as much.
I just figured out by accident that you can make a free mister by screwing a regular hose spray head down to mist-level and hanging it from a bush or tree. We're suddenly struck by heat, drought, and wildfire smoke all at once, and I was mist-watering a distressed maple that way. I looked out my window and saw that all kinds of larger birds, like robins, were frolicking in the mist, totally drenching themselves!
Yes yes yes. Yes to the terrific people supporting you in this work that you're doing. Yes to the poll responses celebrating your work ... excited about your novel excerpt to come.
And yes to rest. I used to take "Tech-Free Tuesdays" where I tried not to use screens ... I often didn't fully achieve that fully but the intention meant I was mostly screenless those days. Just telling people (work, friends, whoever) that you're not available for email/social media/text etc etc for one full day each week is a powerful start to creating rest.
There's a lot of great writing about Sabbaths, both traditional religious perspectives and modern takes related to simple living. I am not great about this right now. I create my rest and spaces more in daily moments than structured whole days. But I like the idea of revisiting some of my thoughts on Sabbaths or tech-free Tuesdays. I think this is especially important as I'm moving into a time where I'm going to be busier (in a more scheduled, committed to others way at least) than I have been in a really long time. Prioritizing the days or hours of rest will help a lot I think.
Thank you so much, Kathryn! I so appreciate your enthusiasm and support!
I love the idea of Tech-Free Tuesday! I do want to move in that direction. I know when I'm on holiday it feels like such a relief to not be glued to my phone or computer. It would be great to experience that in my own home!! At the moment, that's a bridge too far...but step by step by step.
For some reason, I hadn't been considering that I'm creating a Sabbath. Yes. I love this! Thank you for reminding me of this. It feels important.
I was doing my best to create rest and space in daily moments and...clearly failing! I'm excited to try a Sabbath! I hope you also come up with a structure that works for you!
I'm so glad that the framing of "sabbath" resonates. I hope you find continued inspiration and support in that!
Being tech-free is really hard but for me at least setting the intention can create boundaries that are helpful. I may still check my email but not feel as much self-imposed pressure to respond right away. I may keep my phone on but silenced with the exception of emergency text alerts turned on so I can hear from one or two loved ones that I actually do want to communicate with. I remember how much I love to read a book instead of watch a tv show. Little things that end up helping in big ways.
Oooooh, that sounds heavenly! I do keep my phone shut off most of time. I long to remember how much I love to read a book instead of watch tv. I'm grateful to be moving in this direction. It feels so vital! Thank you, Kathryn.
I love that you have prioritised your self care Jane and I am excited for the little moments of joy you are bound to discover in your time off. As I continue to be upgraded and sometimes dragged into my next spiritual uplevel, I find that rest is essential, so I continue to explore this alien place of doing nothing and that being enough. 💫🙏
What a wonderful post! I love that you are allowing rest to become part of the in and out breath of life for you - that pause between the inhale and the exhale...the space between notes that make a melody sweet!
Yes, Jane, the waves against the cliff below the tent are like a lullaby. They are also probably the first sound I heard in the womb, as my family lived here when I was born. And of course I’ve heard these waves from birth onward from above ground. I can’t remember where I got my little hummingbird mister. It is just a fixture that you put on the end of a hose and suspend from a tree or a bush. I think if you googled, hummingbird mister it would come up. Love how you revel with the creatures!
Such a lovely post. I’m so glad to hear you’re taking steps toward getting more rest in. I find self-care so hard lately, and feel more inspired to do more after reading this. ❤️
Aw, thanks, Cindy. I'm pretty good at all round self-care (forced into it by head injury) but not so much with rest. I'm convinced I have too much to do and don't have time for it--which I do believe is true!! But Anne pointed out that the constant go-go-go is a trauma response--it keeps the adrenaline pumping which is a painkiller and the long list of things to do is a great distraction from the underlying pain. Well, that gave me pause! And also really resonated. I'm guessing that will resonate with you, too. May we both find mountains of rest and recovery!
Meanwhile: I'm a little baffled by tomorrow. I periodically think...but what will I do?? When, of course, that's the very thinking I'm hoping to find space from! Wish me luck!
This is an area so many of us need to look at. My nature is to go rather than stop. Then I watch my two pups who seem to have play/rest figured out so well. First thing they do is pay attention to their bodies. When they finish running they lie down. If I take them outside they roll in the grass then sit there viewing the world. Why can’t I learn this??
Exactly!!! Same with kitty cats!! This week during my daily half hour of rest, I've been plopping on the grass beside them and watching what they watch (birds, squirrels, trees). So far, it's been great!
i love it!
"I discovered how much we overlook, not just about the world, but also about the full potential of our inner life, when our mind is cluttered." "Think Less, Think Better." https://www.nytimes.com/2016/06/19/opinion/sunday/think-less-think-better.html?campaign_id=9&emc=edit_nn_20230819&instance_id=100432&nl=the-morning®i_id=64653268&segment_id=142408&te=1&user_id=d35a90a116e023206cd733283d4a5c66
I look forward to reading this! Thank you!
I take regular time off, but I often struggle with what to do to fill up the time. I have found (work in progress) that it takes some practice and lowering my own expectations. When you have been "fed" for years on the adrenaline rush of productivity, it can be a shock to the system to go without. Last night I accepted an invite to watch a movie with a neighbor. Not someone I've particularly close to, and not my favorite movie, but I very much enjoyed being in the community of others.
Giving myself permission to try all the things. The fails are part of the goal.
Sharon! Yes!!! I've been doing well with the half hour daily breaks thus far. But I was both excited for, and confused and nervous about a Full Day Off. Yikes. I had a rough idea of how it might unfold, and wasn't even sure if I "should" have a rough idea or if I "should" just let it happen (clearly, it's been waaaay too long w/o a day off). And then, that morning my cousin invited me to her cottage on the lake and it turned out to be a perfect day! Yay. Now next Sunday awaits...
love this! I also was invited to a neighbor's house for an impromptu movie night. I am not super close to this neighbor but I decided why not!
I love this - “the fails are part of the goal.” My new mantra! Thank you 🙏🏼 💕
I work full time during the week, so I try to ensure both weekend days are filled with simple pursuits that are restful, enjoyable and I do them as slowly as possible (including a visit to the gym and working out slowly). One of the best things I have ever done is employ someone else to clean my house twice a month, and I really enjoy the fact that I don't have to do this on the weekends. There are of course other chores, but I try to avoid doing those as much as possible and focus on the restful activities.
That is so smart, Louise! And I like the emphasis on moving slowly. One of the things I've always enjoyed about being freelance and now having this newsletter, is I can work whenever I want. That's been terrific for me. But lately I think it's backfiring, so I'm moving toward trying out the structure you've so beautifully laid out here! Thank you!
Yay for time off! So necessary, and yet I can’t seem to take off a full day... I mean I could, I guess. But it often feels impossible! 30 minutes a day, I can do!
Oooooh, Jillian, I'm not convinced I can do it either. I'm concerned I'll be packing out the rest of my week into insanity! For instance, I'm cramming in so much today in preparation for tomorrow, that I haven't taken my half hour rest! Whee! But maybe it will all be okay?! Do you want to experiment together tomorrow?? Let's try it! I'm committed to trying two Sundays. And two weeks of half an hour of rest a day. And then seeing what's what!
Classes start this week so I can’t take tomorrow off:( but I’ll cheer you on. I can definitely do half an hour though:)
Oh my gosh, Jane! I am so grateful for you, too. I love working together. And I love how you are taking care of yourself through this time of burnout. I wish we lived closer so we could watch the birds together (this is part of my daily routine, too). Sending you love.
Watching the birds together would be lovely! Perhaps at a future time! Love back at you! xx
I too take absolute delight daily in watching the birds in my two birdbaths, both crafted from recycled beach glass and rebar, with more beach glass and stones inside for the birds to perch on. I also recently learned that our very necessary wasps, hornets, and bees need water, and they are along the edges sipping. Our birdbaths are surrounded by a scoop of shrubs and perches, above a little native plant garden, so the creatures have privacy and safety, but we can see them from our deck. Every time I walk past that little bird haven on my way to the big canvas tent where we sleep in the summer, my heart soars. We recently had one of those heat waves, and I hooked up the hummingbird sprayer so a soft mist filled the area. Flocks of tiny birds danced around the entire birdbath nook vocalizing to the others to join in.
Ooooooh, Kirie, how beautiful!! My version of that calms my nervous system and soothes my soul like nothing else. Sounds like you have a similar experience. And, yes, I have a hive in my back garden and I love how the bees drink from the edges. I also have stones in the middle--mine are for the bees...but they rarely use them. But the bees do! It's so joyful to watch them drink and splash around. And I have birds who take dirt baths, also quite wondrous! Plus all the squirrels and chipmunks and bunnies, et cetera.
One thing I do not have is a tent. I love that you sleep out there in the summer. Do you find you sleep more deeply?
Also: What's a hummingbird sprayer? I might need one of those!
You've inspired me to find myself a bird mister! This sounds lovely. And its been so hot where we are, I have been not wanting to venture outside as much.
I just figured out by accident that you can make a free mister by screwing a regular hose spray head down to mist-level and hanging it from a bush or tree. We're suddenly struck by heat, drought, and wildfire smoke all at once, and I was mist-watering a distressed maple that way. I looked out my window and saw that all kinds of larger birds, like robins, were frolicking in the mist, totally drenching themselves!
Brilliant
Yes yes yes. Yes to the terrific people supporting you in this work that you're doing. Yes to the poll responses celebrating your work ... excited about your novel excerpt to come.
And yes to rest. I used to take "Tech-Free Tuesdays" where I tried not to use screens ... I often didn't fully achieve that fully but the intention meant I was mostly screenless those days. Just telling people (work, friends, whoever) that you're not available for email/social media/text etc etc for one full day each week is a powerful start to creating rest.
There's a lot of great writing about Sabbaths, both traditional religious perspectives and modern takes related to simple living. I am not great about this right now. I create my rest and spaces more in daily moments than structured whole days. But I like the idea of revisiting some of my thoughts on Sabbaths or tech-free Tuesdays. I think this is especially important as I'm moving into a time where I'm going to be busier (in a more scheduled, committed to others way at least) than I have been in a really long time. Prioritizing the days or hours of rest will help a lot I think.
Thank you so much, Kathryn! I so appreciate your enthusiasm and support!
I love the idea of Tech-Free Tuesday! I do want to move in that direction. I know when I'm on holiday it feels like such a relief to not be glued to my phone or computer. It would be great to experience that in my own home!! At the moment, that's a bridge too far...but step by step by step.
For some reason, I hadn't been considering that I'm creating a Sabbath. Yes. I love this! Thank you for reminding me of this. It feels important.
I was doing my best to create rest and space in daily moments and...clearly failing! I'm excited to try a Sabbath! I hope you also come up with a structure that works for you!
I'm so glad that the framing of "sabbath" resonates. I hope you find continued inspiration and support in that!
Being tech-free is really hard but for me at least setting the intention can create boundaries that are helpful. I may still check my email but not feel as much self-imposed pressure to respond right away. I may keep my phone on but silenced with the exception of emergency text alerts turned on so I can hear from one or two loved ones that I actually do want to communicate with. I remember how much I love to read a book instead of watch a tv show. Little things that end up helping in big ways.
Oooooh, that sounds heavenly! I do keep my phone shut off most of time. I long to remember how much I love to read a book instead of watch tv. I'm grateful to be moving in this direction. It feels so vital! Thank you, Kathryn.
Thanks for the shoutout Jane! Can't wait to hear how your first full day off and daily half hours of relaxation went for you!
Thank YOU, Anne. And: so far, so good!
I love that you have prioritised your self care Jane and I am excited for the little moments of joy you are bound to discover in your time off. As I continue to be upgraded and sometimes dragged into my next spiritual uplevel, I find that rest is essential, so I continue to explore this alien place of doing nothing and that being enough. 💫🙏
Yes to being sometimes dragged! Yes to it being alien! And yes to finding little moments of joy! Seems we're on similar paths!
What a wonderful post! I love that you are allowing rest to become part of the in and out breath of life for you - that pause between the inhale and the exhale...the space between notes that make a melody sweet!
It does! It's a small but big change for me. So far, so good!
Such a beautiful post, Jane.
Thank you!
Oh, thank you, Dana!!
Yes, Jane, the waves against the cliff below the tent are like a lullaby. They are also probably the first sound I heard in the womb, as my family lived here when I was born. And of course I’ve heard these waves from birth onward from above ground. I can’t remember where I got my little hummingbird mister. It is just a fixture that you put on the end of a hose and suspend from a tree or a bush. I think if you googled, hummingbird mister it would come up. Love how you revel with the creatures!
How lovely!! Where do you live, Kirie?
Such a lovely post. I’m so glad to hear you’re taking steps toward getting more rest in. I find self-care so hard lately, and feel more inspired to do more after reading this. ❤️
Aw, thanks, Cindy. I'm pretty good at all round self-care (forced into it by head injury) but not so much with rest. I'm convinced I have too much to do and don't have time for it--which I do believe is true!! But Anne pointed out that the constant go-go-go is a trauma response--it keeps the adrenaline pumping which is a painkiller and the long list of things to do is a great distraction from the underlying pain. Well, that gave me pause! And also really resonated. I'm guessing that will resonate with you, too. May we both find mountains of rest and recovery!
So so helpful to know 🙏🏼 Thanks, Jane
Meanwhile: I'm a little baffled by tomorrow. I periodically think...but what will I do?? When, of course, that's the very thinking I'm hoping to find space from! Wish me luck!
I am in similar boat! Trying to find a good balance. But I think having the awareness of what we need is a pretty solid start 👌🏼
Yes! That's how I feel, too!