Duality in Grief

The Body, Brain, and Books: Eleven Questions with author Amy Gabrielle

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Amy Gabrielle is a writer, digital creator, and advocate for authentic self-expression in midlife women. Following her husband’s death from cancer, she began using memoir and social media to explore the complex intersection of grief and desire, cultivating a community of thousands drawn to honest conversations about life after loss. Widow in the City, A Memoir of Heartbreaks and Hookups (published by She Writes Press / distributed by Simon & Schuster) was published in May 2026. Her work also appears in Absolute Pleasure and Narratively on Substack, as well as Medium publications including The Memoirist and Slackjaw. She lives in New York City, where she enjoys photography, travel, and raising her son.

1. What are you reading now?

I’ve mostly been listening to audiobooks and I just finished The Midnight Croissant by my good friend Bonnie Solomon. It’s a wonderful, feel-good cozy fantasy set in modern day Paris, France.

2. What are your most beloved books from your youth? Did you ever hide any from your parents?

I loved From the Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler by E. L. Konigsburg. It’s about a brother and sister that “run away” to the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York City (where I grew up) and become embroiled in a mystery. I also read a lot of Judy Blume: Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing, Deenie, Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret, Mom, the Wolfman and Me, and Forever.

Beautifully inscribed gift from Amy’s parents.

3. What’s your favorite book to reread? Any that helped you through a dark time?

When I was fifteen, my mother and step-father gave me The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran. It’s a collection of twenty-six poetic essays offering philosophical wisdom on universal themes like love, marriage, work, freedom, and death. They’ve both passed away, but I still have the copy they gave me with their beautiful inscription.

Amy’s fancy sneakers!

4. What’s an article of clothing that makes you feel most like you?

I love my rhinestone studded sneakers by Betsey Johnson because I can feel comfortable and a little bit fancy at the same time.

5. What’s the best piece of wisdom you’ve encountered recently?

The only thing we can control in life are our own thoughts, feelings and actions.

Milo!

6. Tell me about any special relationship you’ve had with an animal, domestic or wild?

A few months after my husband died I hired a babysitter to help me with my son who had just turned ten years old. We didn’t have any pets, but Charlotte would sometimes bring her golden retriever when she picked up my son from school. We both loved Milo, who had just turned a year old, and spent the next two summers living with both of them at a house we rented with a pool. I feel nostalgic for that time.

7. What’s one thing you are happy worked out differently than you expected?

I think I might have answered this question differently before my husband died in August 2021. My first thought is that I am NOT happy about that part of my life turning out differently than I expected, but his death changed my whole world – and it’s not all bad. I don’t know if I would have become a writer or published a memoir if he lived, which I am happy about. There’s a duality in grief and I find I’m both happy and sad at the same time.

8. Singing in the shower or dancing in the kitchen? Or another favorite way your body expresses itself?

One hundred percent dancing in the kitchen!

9. What are your hopes for yourself?

I’ve spent a lot of time alone the last three years, mostly writing in my apartment. I never got back to “normal” after the Covid lockdowns but I would like to find more community in person. Most of my human interaction is over Zoom or another online platform because the city has felt overwhelming to me. I’ve reinvented my life a few times in recent years and find myself once again on the cusp of something new; I just don’t know what it is yet.

10. What’s a kindness that changed your life?

I have a small group of writer friends who encouraged me early on. Their kind words and positive comments kept me going when I felt self-critical or too vulnerable. I wish people understood how much their support means to writers and other artists. They might think it’s just a few words typed into a comment box, but sometimes it feels like a lifeline.

11. What’s a guiding force in your life?

Humans have created too many structures that divide us, like religion, race, and the gender binary. The DNA of any two people on Earth is approximately ninety-nine point nine percent identical. At our core, we all want to be loved and appreciated for who we are. My guiding force is dismantling hierarchical cultural and economic systems that relegate so many to the margins.

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If you enjoyed Amy’s answers, you might also enjoy this Questionnaire with Noha Beshir:

A Place Of Love And Hope

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