I am a psychologist who's practice is called About Motherhood. It is my life work and I have been doing it for about three decades. It was started because when I became a mother, huge parts of me were lost, and there was no language except a “ what's wrong with me” inadequacy. I wrote my doctoral dissertation on the subject, and found my way out through my firm belief that someone who loved her kid as much as I did was NOT inadequate. Slowly I designed a practice that teaches mom's to deconstruct social messaging that is deeply internalized, over generations, across societies.
All this to say...Cindy Lamothe, my deepest bow to you; for your inner work to find that love is the only way out, and your fantastic ability to language your journey. I would recommend this article for every mother. Thank you🙏🏽.
I keep this small tint of items from childhood and teen years mostly photos and old movie ticket stubs. But always a favorite image of this friend and I-- because it was timeless and I wanna hold onto that memory forever
In her essay, Cindy captures what I experienced when I was pregnant and ater, after giving birth to my son. I had no words for the metamorphosis then. I was only 18. I remember losing the tenuous hold I had on myself and periods of suspension, or waiting,. I later told a friend that I was not only giving birth to my son , he was somehow giving birth to me, or at least the next version of me.
I bought a crate and barrel desk as my first piece of furniture. It didn’t cost a lot but at the time I wasn’t working and also was living in someone else’s house for 6 years. I wanted a place to sit to write. Still love this desk and keep it in my living room instead of the office. Thank you this beautiful piece of writing
Cindy, this is beyond beautiful, tender, and poignant. What a gift you have to express these oh so intangible emotions. I will share widely. So moved by this essay. Thank you. And thank you Jane, for sharing it with your readers.
Cindy's words about those early days, weeks and months of motherhood resonate so strongly with me. Sadly, I didn't find the insight, support nor the strength to see any of the good in it and struggled hugely including suffering from post-natal depression. I was so very glad to get back to work at
the end of my 8-week maternity leave, I buried myself back in my work which had up until then defined me as an individual. Fortunately, I started to have a relationship with my son when he was about three and we have a lovely relationship now (he's 25). But I lost a piece of myself forever and I still don't know how to get it back. Plus, I feel so lacking as a mother and guilty guilty guilty about all my shortcomings in that role of my life. I am glad to see so much more support for new mothers today in the area of mental health, not everyone is a natural mother, it was all so foreign and stressful for me.
I love how delicately these words are woven together and seem to somehow embrace all of our human struggles and complexities. Thank you for sharing this ❤️
This is beautiful- and so important that these stories reach the world. The vastness of what we go through in becoming mothers can not be underestimated. The line ‘You are still you’ was good for me to hear. Thanks Cindy.
This piece is so profoundly touching that it brings new meaning to interior design; the moving of the 'desk' into the room of one's own which made me think that it was an interior space and the womb of one's one. I find this piece is incredibly settling in that it blends the shift we go through as parents of our children, and parents of ourselves as children-grown. Cindy's words had me playing with words, as evidenced here in my response. And it won't stop as I consider what went into the peace of the piece and her inner and in-her self. I became mesmerized by the prose-full way with which Lamothe accounts for her lifeforce.
I am a psychologist who's practice is called About Motherhood. It is my life work and I have been doing it for about three decades. It was started because when I became a mother, huge parts of me were lost, and there was no language except a “ what's wrong with me” inadequacy. I wrote my doctoral dissertation on the subject, and found my way out through my firm belief that someone who loved her kid as much as I did was NOT inadequate. Slowly I designed a practice that teaches mom's to deconstruct social messaging that is deeply internalized, over generations, across societies.
All this to say...Cindy Lamothe, my deepest bow to you; for your inner work to find that love is the only way out, and your fantastic ability to language your journey. I would recommend this article for every mother. Thank you🙏🏽.
I keep this small tint of items from childhood and teen years mostly photos and old movie ticket stubs. But always a favorite image of this friend and I-- because it was timeless and I wanna hold onto that memory forever
In her essay, Cindy captures what I experienced when I was pregnant and ater, after giving birth to my son. I had no words for the metamorphosis then. I was only 18. I remember losing the tenuous hold I had on myself and periods of suspension, or waiting,. I later told a friend that I was not only giving birth to my son , he was somehow giving birth to me, or at least the next version of me.
I bought a crate and barrel desk as my first piece of furniture. It didn’t cost a lot but at the time I wasn’t working and also was living in someone else’s house for 6 years. I wanted a place to sit to write. Still love this desk and keep it in my living room instead of the office. Thank you this beautiful piece of writing
Cindy, this is beyond beautiful, tender, and poignant. What a gift you have to express these oh so intangible emotions. I will share widely. So moved by this essay. Thank you. And thank you Jane, for sharing it with your readers.
Cindy's words about those early days, weeks and months of motherhood resonate so strongly with me. Sadly, I didn't find the insight, support nor the strength to see any of the good in it and struggled hugely including suffering from post-natal depression. I was so very glad to get back to work at
the end of my 8-week maternity leave, I buried myself back in my work which had up until then defined me as an individual. Fortunately, I started to have a relationship with my son when he was about three and we have a lovely relationship now (he's 25). But I lost a piece of myself forever and I still don't know how to get it back. Plus, I feel so lacking as a mother and guilty guilty guilty about all my shortcomings in that role of my life. I am glad to see so much more support for new mothers today in the area of mental health, not everyone is a natural mother, it was all so foreign and stressful for me.
What a writer! Thank you, Jane! And thank you, Cindy. Soul-sustaining!
I love how delicately these words are woven together and seem to somehow embrace all of our human struggles and complexities. Thank you for sharing this ❤️
This is beautiful- and so important that these stories reach the world. The vastness of what we go through in becoming mothers can not be underestimated. The line ‘You are still you’ was good for me to hear. Thanks Cindy.
This piece is so profoundly touching that it brings new meaning to interior design; the moving of the 'desk' into the room of one's own which made me think that it was an interior space and the womb of one's one. I find this piece is incredibly settling in that it blends the shift we go through as parents of our children, and parents of ourselves as children-grown. Cindy's words had me playing with words, as evidenced here in my response. And it won't stop as I consider what went into the peace of the piece and her inner and in-her self. I became mesmerized by the prose-full way with which Lamothe accounts for her lifeforce.